Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.

Hi. So I have struggled with depression since I was in the 6th grade. It comes in waves and it is always ten times worse during the winter months. I have happy days and I have sad days. I’ve been on 786969589 anti-depressants. I used to have a little anxiety but now it’s eight million times worse. It’s progressively gotten to the point it is at since my mom left us. I still see her, talk to her, and tell her I love her etc but I am still SO SO angry with her. Anyway, I am getting off track. I sp… Continue

First of all, THANK YOU for your support. Things are not easy for me right now and I appreciate your kind words. I’ve been doing okay the past few days. Ate out too much but what are you going to do? I am starting a six-week challenge for myself. Just to get my butt into the gym at least four times a week, if not five for six weeks straight. Apparently after six weeks of doing something like exercising it becomes a habit and you no longer dread it. So maybe that will trick my mind or something,… Continue

Time to get personal. Time to explain why I haven’t been around and why I am up five pounds. Time to get real. Last week my Jeep began to die, it’s still running but is almost certainly doomed for death. My car is going to cost at least $500 to fix. So I have two cars, both taking a poop on me. Cue work stress. Some lady I responded to is now suing the hospital and the attorney general is involved, sweet. Cue love life down the tubes. Boyfriend and I had a fight Sunday morning. I come home Sunda… Continue

I am so unmotivated this week and depressed. I don't know what it is but it started Monday. My gym membership is up and I am too poor to renew it until the 27th which gets me down.......but all I want to do is sleep and that's all I have been doing along with beating myself up on a daily basis........I hate it. I have two cars and BOTH, yes both of them, are dying/dead. Hopefully the Jeep will last until the car is fixed but that's going to suck more money out of my pay on the 27th. I can't stan… Continue

:-] Yesterday was a GOOD day. The sun motivated me and put me in a fantastic mood. I was jamming & dancing in my car all the way to the gym. Then I had SO much energy I did 3.51 miles in 41 minutes burning a total of 530 calories! WOOP! Then I went home, cleaned my bathroom and kitchen, organized a few things and sat down with a bowl of chili and my book. I was 100% OP and although I didn’t exercise 60 minutes I’d say what I did do was good enough.

Yesterday’s journal:

Bagel with PB 9
Tort… Continue