Food Not In My Head

I'm doing okay with the workouts. I haven't really worked out this week and for no real reason other than it's been really cold here in Texas and I HATE to be cold! More than hating to be cold, I hate to be wet and cold, so when I work out in the morning and have to shower and change for work only to go outside, still a little wet from the shower, my hair still with a little sweat in it (my hair is too long to wash and dry at the gym and still make it to work on time) and the cold/wet feeling hits me and I can just feel the flu trying to seep into my pores! I hate that feeling!

Okay, I digress. I needed to work out this week and I didn't. I worked out for 4 days last week and I now realize that if I allow myself a day off, it totally derails me. I'm going out of town this weekend, so I plan to get back on workout track on Monday. I like working out. I'm good at it. I get it. I like to run on the treadmill. I like to workout with the machines and free weights and bands and the ball. I LIKE TO WORK OUT! Yes, I do.

However, food is becoming a HUGE issue for me. I cannot wrap my head around eating properly right now. I know what to do. I know what to cook. I know how to do it. I just can't get there. I am still stopping by Starbucks every morning for my frappuccino and pastry of some sort. I have been eating out to lunch every day instead of bringing my lunch. I NEED to get this figured out!! I need so badly to get past this hurdle!

The oddest thing about all of this is that since I've gained back those 22 pounds +some (and realized how easy it is to gain weight, but how hard it is to lose it!!), I'm still in a size 14. It's not just that my 14s have stretched, either. I went shopping this past weekend for some work clothes and the 16s were too big, but the 14s fit perfectly. In fact, I'm sitting here in a new pair of size 16 pants that I've decided are too big, even though I love them and will just belt them because I think they're awesome. How weird is that??

We're going to start trying to have a baby this spring, like April. I need to get 40 pounds off before I start gaining baby weight, preferably closer to 60 pounds, but there's no way I can do that if I don't get on the wagon!

Holy crap. I just feel like I'm sitting on the side of the road watching the wagons go by and just can't find it in myself to jump on one. AUGH!!